Raw & Real: When Faith Feels Like a Fight

We don’t like to admit it, but let’s be real—sometimes we get upset with God. Not just confused. Not just disappointed. But truly, deeply frustrated. We know the right things to say—“God’s timing is perfect,” “He has a plan,” “Just keep trusting”—but what happens when those words feel hollow? When we’ve prayed the same prayers for months, years, maybe even decades, and all we hear is silence?

I know that feeling. I’ve lived that feeling. There are things I’ve been praying for—pleading for—for over five years. I won’t get into the details, because honestly, that’s not the point. The point is, I’ve spent nights crying into my pillow, wondering if my prayers even make it past the ceiling. I’ve had moments where I’ve crossed my arms like a stubborn child, saying, Fine, God. If You’re not going to answer, then why should I keep asking? I’ve gone through seasons where my faith felt more like exhaustion than confidence, where worship felt forced, and where I wondered if I was just talking to myself when I prayed.

And you know what? That’s real. That’s raw. And maybe you’ve been there too.

Because here’s the thing: relationships are messy. Friendships, marriages, family—they all have ups and downs. And our relationship with God is no different. We love to talk about the mountaintop moments, when His presence feels so close it’s undeniable. But what about the valleys? What about the days when He feels a million miles away?

If you’re in that place, I want you to know two things: You are not alone. And God is not afraid of your feelings. He’s not sitting there waiting for you to get yourself together before you come to Him. He already knows your frustration, your heartbreak, your doubts. And He wants you to bring it all to Him.

So what do you do when you feel like God isn’t answering?

1. Be Honest with God – You don’t have to fake it. God never asked us to clean up our emotions before coming to Him. The Bible is filled with people crying out to God in frustration. David, a man after God’s own heart, said in Psalm 13:1, “How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever?” Job, in the middle of his suffering, questioned God. And even Jesus, on the cross, cried out, “My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?” (Matthew 27:46). If Jesus Himself felt abandoned in His most painful moment, you don’t have to pretend you don’t feel it too.

2. Remember Who God Is – When we don’t see answers, it’s easy to start questioning God’s character. Maybe He doesn’t care. Maybe He’s not actually listening. Maybe I did something wrong. But the truth is, He is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8). Lamentations 3:22-23 says, “Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning.” Your circumstances may shift, but He does not.

3. Shift Your Focus – It’s okay to grieve the prayers that feel unanswered, but don’t let that grief harden your heart. Philippians 4:8 tells us to think about what is true, noble, and praiseworthy. That doesn’t mean ignoring your pain—it means recognizing that God is still moving, even when it’s not in the way you expected. Maybe the breakthrough hasn’t come, but what about the strength He’s given you to keep going? What about the unexpected ways He’s carried you through?

4. Keep Showing Up – When you’re hurt, the natural reaction is to pull away. To stop praying. To stop hoping. But James 4:8 says, “Draw near to God, and He will draw near to you.” Even if your prayers feel empty, even if you have nothing to say, even if worship feels like going through the motions—show up anyway. God is not measuring your faith by how strong you feel. He sees the effort. He sees the small, quiet moments when you choose to seek Him, even when it’s hard.

5. Trust in His Sovereignty – This is the hardest one. Proverbs 3:5-6 tells us, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.” That’s easy to say when life is going well, but when you’re in the waiting? When nothing makes sense? That’s where real faith is built. Faith is not about having all the answers. It’s about trusting the One who does.

If you’re struggling with unanswered prayers, I want you to hear me: You are not a bad Christian for feeling this way. Your faith is not weak because you have questions. Being upset with God doesn’t mean you don’t love Him—it means you have a real relationship with Him. And real relationships have struggles.

But here’s what I know: God sees you. He hears you. And even in the silence, even in the unanswered prayers, He is still working. One day—whether in this life or in eternity—you’ll see the full picture. And when you do, you’ll realize He was never ignoring you. He was always holding you.

So don’t let go. Keep praying. Keep trusting. Even when it’s hard. Even when it hurts. Because He is still good. And He is still God. 

xx, Taira :)